Going to the doctor was discouraging and uneventful. We didn't start the recurrent miscarriage panel on me because the doctor brought up cost. Well, frankly, I don't care much about the cost, but it's not only up to me and right now we can't afford a big unexpected expense, so we're going to see what insurance will cover first and work it out from there. It's annoying that I can't figure out what's going on because we have to be concerned with finances. The way the medical system works is totally fucked. Just putting that out there.
It was also discouraging because, as nice as the doctor seems, she wasn't very positive about the outcome of doing the panel. Basically, she seemed to think the outcome may not produce answers and used the word "tricky" several times. The test on the baby is "tricky," the panel might be "tricky" as often everything turns up "normal" (what DOES that mean, medically, anyway? the range of "normal" results for any given thing is ridiculously large), even if something wrong did turn up with my results, dealing with it or fixing it or making it better next time can be "tricky." She also said that "some physicians might say 'what's the point?'" REALLY? The point, for me, is not having to keep losing a baby who once had a heartbeat. Isn't that a good enough reason?
Also, they had not yet yielded any results on the baby. I REALLY REALLY hope this doesn't mean that we won't be able to find anything out. I'm pretty torn. If we find out nothing, then I'll still have billions of questions... forever. If we find out something was wrong with the baby, then, well, something was wrong with my baby. If we find out the baby was OK, then we'll wonder why this happened, or if there was something we could've done to prevent it. It's hard, but I'd like to know either way. It won't change what happened, but a little closure would be great.
We'd like to try again but at this point, I don't know what to do. We're not getting any younger, the kids aren't getting any younger, and I don't want to push my luck and find out how many times I can deal with going through this. It's so frustrating and upsetting. I know I feel discouraged.
This is a dumb question, but have you gone to a fertility specialist? Or is this a general OBGYN? I went to Colorado Reproductive Specialists in Littleton and though they were SUPER aggressive in their advice, they were really really interested in getting people pregnant. And staying pregnant. They deal with a lot of patients with PCOS or endometriosis. Though you don't have something specific "wrong" with you - I bet they'd be willing to do a consult. My insurance covered the entire workup. Just a thought...
ReplyDeleteI agree with Tree Hugging Attorney. A lot of OB's just aren't equipped to deal with fertility and RPL issues. And often they don't dig as deep as an RE would do. AND RE's often know the proper codes to kind of "cheat" (for lack of a better word) the system to get things covered my insurance. All of my testing was covered by insurance when technically my plan said it shouldn't be.
ReplyDeleteAs far as calling everything "tricky"...I disagree! It's not tricky...its straightforward, either you have something going on or you don't. It kind of sounds like she doesn't want to take the time to do this, maybe?
When I had all my testing done pretty much everything came back normal. Nothing was pinpointed as "the" reason we had our losses. We found a few things that might cause a few issues but probably not. But we're treating them at the very least and that does provide some peace of mind. I'm like you, I'd rather go into it knowing I've done everything on my part to make sure it doesn't happen again, because if it did and I hadn't done so then I'd be beating myself up.
Sorry, I'm rambling on and on! I'm praying you get some answers Alex. And praying that the insurance company decides to have a heart and pay for the testing! (((hugs)))
Frustrating, huh? I wish I felt like I had a doctor on my side through all this! Maybe I'll look in to seeing someone who knows more about this and has a better attitude about looking into this. It definitely matters to me, and after losing 2 well loved babies, I don't understand how anyone could ask "what's the point" of finding out why they couldn't stay.
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